I have a new video for you today that has the power to “rock your world” as my friend Isabel likes to say and in a profoundly positive way.
Do you ever feel overwhelmed with all the things you need to pay attention to as a parent?
Do you ever wonder if you are on the right track as a parent or if there is something more your child needs and wants to develop fully, to be happy, self-confident and self-reliant?
Today’s video will help you cut through all the chatter and conflicting parenting ideas out there. This is the parenting question that is intrinsic to all other parenting questions. It underlies all parenting decisions you make.
Enjoy!
Let me know what you think, and if you like this video, please tell others!
Just a little bit about me -- I'm a coach for parents, visionary guide, insightful trainer, and powerful consultant.
Thank you for this, Connie. It is so important to nurture who are kids are – and to set an example by nurturing ourselves and our own truth. This is often the uncomfortable path – and while it feels unsafe, in the end it is really the only safe path. I’ll consider myself a successful parent if I can get out of my kids way more and let go of trying to ensure that everything in their lives works out the way “I” want it to.
Nice one Connie! I see it with my clients everyday – the unconscious choice and then the frustration with the results. Having just one question to weigh against is simply brilliant. I have passed the link on to the parents of my wonderful nephew.
I like what you’re saying here — and that’s what I want for my son. I also want him to learn basic social rules, like not yelling in a restaurant and being kind with how he treats people and animals. It kind of sounds like what you’re saying is that we have to choose between those two things. Isn’t it possible to do both?
Jenna, thank you for your great question. Yes, it is possible to do both. To do it well, you first need to deeply commit to supporting your son in being who he is and to not compromise to the best of your awareness. From that foundation, explore and make intentional, conscious choices about what is important and how he will learn social rules. Telling and enforcing are not the only strategies.
Social rules are based on the culture in which you live, which includes the country, the region of the country, the community, and your family. Change one of these – visit another country or family – and the social rules will change. I have found that our desire to have our child learn social rules is fraught with our own emotional desires and confusion so it is difficult to be neutral or objective about what we consider are our child’s ‘inappropriate social actions.’ Thus, the importance of being aware and intentional in your choices.
In the coming weeks, I will talk more about this. Next week’s video says more about this topic as will other upcoming videos. The teleclasses I will teach this fall “Why Johnny Doesn’t Listen and What You Can Do About It” and “Setting Limits that Empower Your Child” will also address this topic. Perhaps I will do a teleclass on helping your child learn social rules. I often see parents struggle with this concern.
Thanks again for your thoughtful question. It is an important area that profoundly affects our children’s lives.
Thanks Connie! Great advice. I am looking forward to your next video!