Are You Putting Everyone Else’s Needs Before Your Own?

The message this time of year is “Joy!” and “Make
Merry!” But is this really what you’re feeling as you haul yourself out of bed
in the morning, get your children to school, rush through your day and arrive
home to make sure homework is done and your children are in bed on time? And
squeeze in shopping and parties?

Probably not. Joy is often postponed until a later
date when you have the time or for a special event. 

If you’re like many moms – and dads, too – you expend
much of your energy and time taking care of your child’s and partner’s needs
and wants, relegating your own to the back burner for a later date. You may
feel you don’t deserve or can’t afford some private, nurturing time for
yourself when yesterday’s dishes are still in the sink.

You may feel you shouldn’t read the mystery you love
or take a nice hot soak when your child can’t seem to find anything to do and
he needs you to entertain him.

Or your husband has had a long day of work, and you
don’t want to burden him with taking care of your child when he wants to watch
TV.

Yet taking care of yourself is essential to you and
your family if you are to truly succeed in nurturing your family’s emotional
needs and empowering them to live their best life, joyously and successfully. I
cannot stress this too much.

In fact, I continually focus on taking excellent care
of myself and my own joy and fulfillment. The more I do it, the better I feel
and the more I enjoy my family and my life.

Of course, it’s important to respond to your family’s
emotional and physical needs. I’m not suggesting you neglect or ignore them. You’ll
find, however, the more you deeply nurture yourself, the more you’ll naturally want
to nurture your child and everyone else in your family.

Without some ‘Me Time’ and ‘Couple Time’, your effectiveness
and fulfillment as a mom and as a wife will be significantly diminished.

Here
are 5 important reasons why taking good care of yourself every day and
nurturing your own joy and fulfillment are ESSENTIAL for your family’s love,
joy, and Emotional Wholeness this holiday season and throughout the coming
year.

Reason #1  You feel happier, more content and fulfilled.

This means you come to your child and partner renewed,
refreshed, and ready to be more fully present. You literally bring your joy to
your interactions with your family. It only takes a moment of thought to
realize how important this is to their joy and contentment.

Reason #2  You have a clearer perception of potentially difficult situations
with your child and your partner.

You’ll listen more deeply and be more understanding
of his feelings in the situation. This helps you find win-win solutions and
prevent conflicts and emotional meltdowns. You’ll break away from the should’s
and do what is best for both of you.

Reason #3  You create an
emotionally and physically safe environment for all the people in your family.

When you’ve pushed yourself to your limit or beyond
your limit, your own emotional and energy reserves are depleted. At these
times, you have a short fuse and little things, like a forgotten kiss or a
little hesitation about getting ready for bed, can put you over the top and
into your own emotional meltdown.

When you feel impatient and at the end of your rope,
no one feels safe, not even you.

Reason #4  You model to your
child and your partner how to make choices that nurture one’s self.

You play a powerful role in
your family whether you realize it or not. One of the
most important things your child learns from you is how you treat yourself.
When you find yourself postponing or neglecting what you need and want for
yourself, ask yourself if this is the way you want your child to treat
her/himself.

Nothing I know of makes the importance of nurturing
your own joy more clear than to consider your child doing the same things they
see you do daily.

Reason #5  You live a fuller,
richer, deeper experience in life and in your family.

Imagine for a moment what a more joyous, fulfilling
life would be like for you. What would you do that you love? How would you feel
to simply delight in your family and in your life? How would it change the
choices you make if this were your reality on a consistent, on-going basis?

Make taking care of yourself a high priority this
holiday season and throughout the coming year!

Many moms won’t do this for themselves, and they will
do it for their child and their family. It doesn’t matter as much ‘why’ you
give yourself a more fulfilling life as it does that you do it. Everyone
benefits. You’ll see more delight and joy in your family’s eyes, and you’ll
create a more fulfilling, rewarding life for both yourself and everyone in your
family.

Try it! You’ll be amazed by the results.

I’d love to hear from you. Let me know what you
discover.