No one wants their child to be gullible. Yet parents and teachers unconsciously do things that encourage it. Webster defines gullible as “easily deceived or cheated, naive.”
What makes a child gullible? A tendency to go along with what someone is telling you without thinking for one’s self. Not trusting one’s self.
Psychologist Stephen Greenspan, author of Annals of Gullibility: Why We Get Duped and How to Avoid It, recently appeared on NPR’s Science Friday to talk about his being duped in the Bernard Madoff's money-making scheme, which fooled many clever people.
He made two very revealing comments during the interview.
1. His mom always told him,”Don’t be so willing to do what your friends tell you.”
2. He described himself as having “a tendency to be a nice guy and to do what people tell me.”
To listen to his interview, go here.
One secret to lessen your child's or students' gullibility is to support her child to think for herself and to encourage individual discernment, both at home and at school. When parents and educators try to do the thinking for children, they unknowingly diminish a child’s self-trust, autonomy, and awareness.
Denise Clark Pope in her book “Doing School”: How We Are Creating a Generation of Stressed Out, Materialistic, and Miseducated Students reports on a high-achieving sophomore in high school who explained “sincerely that, ideally, he wishes he could forget about the grades and just do the work the way he wants to do it. He wishes he could write papers the way he would like to see them written, instead of how the teachers want to see them.”
Kevin says with a sigh, “I wish I could say I’m an individual, and I am not going to sacrifice my individuality for a grade, you know…just write for writing’s sake.”
This is one place gullibility begins—when a young person feels they have to pay attention to others more than to herself. She becomes a people-pleaser and stops thinking for herself.. Then she is more easily prey for others who want take advantage of her naivete.