Yesterday I watched Oprah interview 4 convicted child molesters, 3 of whom molested a family member. I know we’ve all heard horror stories of young children’s violations and the long-term price these young people pay.

This is not one of those stories. This post is about what best protects your child from sexual abuse or any other kind of abuse by others.

I learned several interesting facts I’d like to share with you.

1. Molesters ‘groom’ their targets. They gain their trust by being nice to them then begin touching them in non-sexual ways and gradually moving on to more intimate touching. They consciously manipulate their prey.

2. All four molesters believed they were giving the young children pleasure, not pain. This came as a real shocker to me. Yet when I thought about it, I realized abusers do not have the emotional awareness and maturity to realize the emotional impact of what they are doing.

I see these men as profoundly emotionally injured and hurt little boys, trying to find love and connection in the best way they knew how. They are not bad or mean people. They are confused and hurting people and deserve our compassion. AND this does not make it acceptable in any way that they violated these young people in the ways they did.

Here is the most important information for parents to remember and act upon to best protect your child from sexual abuse:

When these emotionally-hurting men looked around for a young person to molest, they looked for a child who was struggling emotionally and in need of someone to love them. These men looked for anger and retaliation toward their parents and not feeling connected and loved by their parents. [Read more…]