The Passing of a Leading Light for Children and Parents

Some of you may know of her or have read her book. Some of you will never have heard of her.

I discovered Jean Liedloff, author of The Continuum Concept: In Search of Happiness Lost, shortly after my son Orion was born 35 years ago. Her book profoundly impacted me because she confirmed and validated what I already envisioned as a parent.

She inspired me and gave me the courage to continue on the path I had begun. For this, I am deeply appreciative.

For two years as a young woman, Jean lived with Stone Age Indians in the South American rainforest. At first judgmental of their seemingly primitive and inadequate parenting, she discovered a new view of what human nature really is and what our children most need from us. She realized the limitations of our Western, ‘civilized’ ways of parenting.

Here is a must-see video that will most-likely challenge what you believe to be true as a parent and give you profound new insights in perceiving your child. Even if you are the parent of a teen or an adult child, you can learn a lot from this wise woman of our time.

The video is 53 minutes, and it is worth every second. Don’t let this go by! Create a time this weekend to watch it all. Share it with your partner. Let it make a difference in your life!

Watch the video here.

Enjoy!

Children Get Smarter with Video Games

My thirty-something son Orion has played video games for many years, perhaps as many as 25; and he loves them. He’s often gravitated toward the violent ones, in which he competes against other players to see who goes down first or who makes it to the end first.

I’ve never worried about him becoming violent or aggressive in day-to-day living because that is not who he is. Children who are happy and mostly enjoying their life are not aggressive toward others. Perhaps he uses it to work out some of his frustration, which I believe is totally acceptable. It’s certainly an opportunity for him to have fun with his guy friends.

Beyond these reasons, I’ve always believed Orion was getting something more from video games that went beyond the ‘violence’ and social interaction, something that was not obvious to me as an outsider.

In fact, I believed an entire generation was gaining something valuable and developing unseen skills from these interactive games. Otherwise, why would so many young people and adults be drawn to them? There had to be something positive, not just the dumbing down of our society.

Fortunately, I have found an answer, one that makes sense to me and to Orion. My answer came from a book I just read Everything Bad Is Good For You: How Today’s Popular Culture Is Actually Making Us Smarter by Steven Johnson.

Since childhood, Johnson has been a strategic game player even before the advent of video games so he gets his unique perspective from his own experience as well as from his in-depth research and his willingness to think out-of-the-box.

The startling discovery he found is people are actually getting smarter since the introduction of technology, which includes video games, reality TV, the internet, and popular TV series, such as 24 and Lost. IQ test scores have not reflected this increase in IQ because they’ve been adjusted upward to account for the increased intelligence and companies are making the tests harder. [Read more…]

Helping Your Child with Homework – Most Common Parenting Mistake

If you struggle to get your child to do her homework, the most common mistake you’re likely making is taking responsibility for something that is her responsibility. Too much structure imposed by you limits your child’s ability to create structure that supports and works for her. You’re teaching her to rely on you instead of developing her own inner resources.

Plus, the frequent struggle, conflict and pressure you both experience profoundly hurts the emotional connection between you and your child – your most precious resource and delight as a parent.

The most powerful antidote to struggling with your child to do her homework is to empower your child to develop her own approach and plan about her homework and to stay out of her way, being there for her only when you’re asked.

Are you struggling or concerned about a school-related issue? If you’d like some new ideas and strategies that will help you resolve these challenges, check out my new teleclass series : “The Fast Track to Solving the Day-to-Day Challenges of Helping Your Child Succeed in School.”

Helping Your Child with His Friendships – Most Common Parenting Mistake

If you’re like many parents, you worry about your child’s friendships and interactions with his peers. The most common mistake parents make in this area is finding the balance between being too involved or not involved enough.

When you’re too involved, you tell your child how to handle these interactions rather than empowering him to find his own solutions.

If you’re not involved enough, you unintentionally ignore your child’s cues about how he is doing emotionally.

The most powerful antidote to your child’s struggles and poor choices in friendship is empowering your child to develop inner-driven self-confidence and guiding him to find his own powerful, wise answers to his friendship challenges.

Are you struggling or concerned about a school-related issue? If you’d like some new ideas and strategies that will help you resolve these challenges, check out my new teleclass series : “The Fast Track to Solving the Day-to-Day Challenges of Helping Your Child Succeed in School.”

Academic Pressure on Your Child – Most Common Parenting Mistake

Whether your child is an ‘A’ student or is struggling to ‘pass,’ she daily experiences pressure to perform and meet academic expectations. If she honestly loves school and is relaxed and happy in that environment because school comes easily for her, then she’s probably doing okay.

This is not the case for most children. Most children struggle in one way or another with the pressure to get good grades, learn math and science, to pass the tests, to be the best in their class, to never make a mistake.

If you’re like most parents, the most common and biggest mistake you may make regarding the academic pressure placed on your child is to ignore it. That’s right…ignoring it.

The most powerful antidote to academic pressure to perform in school is a great relationship with your child. With an emotionally close, honest relationship with your child, your child will talk with you about her struggles, her feelings, and you’re there to listen with an open, accepting, loving heart.

From here, the problems of the world can be solved…

Are you struggling or concerned about a school-related issue? If you’d like some new ideas and strategies that will help you resolve these challenges, check out my new teleclass series:  “The Fast Track to Solving the Day-to-Day Challenges of Helping Your Child Succeed in School.”