Mythbusting Bullying: How Big a Problem Is It Really?

“Bullying” is one of the topics you’ve most requested I talk about, and now I’m doing it!

The topic of bullying is fraught with worry and concern about your child as well as what you can do to prevent it and how to best respond when it does happen.

No parent wants their child to feel the humiliation and shame of being bullied. Neither do parents want their child to be the bully or the one who stands by and watches it happen. Yet it always happens outside parents’ reach and influence. Parents are not around; they don’t see it happening and cannot immediately intervene. This can leave  you feeling powerless and uncertain.

As I observe and research how we as a culture are responding to this problem, I’ve uncovered lots of myths and misconceptions about the causes of bullying and what to do about it.

Over the next 3 weeks in a series of short videos, I’m going to share with you some of these myths and misconceptions about bullying so you can make more informed choices how you want to best support your child to be neither the bully, the victim, or the bystander in this escalating problem.

I was going to include this information in my teleclass, but I want to give you the first part of my class for FREE. Bullying is such a complex topic and I have so much I want to share with you, I decided to make this information available to everyone in this video series.

Save the Date!

My new teleclass; “How to Bully-Proof Your Child and What to Do If It Happens” is later this month.

Date: Wednesday, September 25

Time: 5:30 – 7 pm Pacific (9:30 – 11 Eastern)

Be sure to save the date in your calendar.

Below is the first in the series.

What are your biggest concerns about bullying? Let me know in Comments.!

 

What Did You Discover?

Over the weekend, I sent you an exercise to help you discover how much your child ‘wants’ to listen to you, the operative word here being ‘want.’ Have you had a chance to do it?

If you haven’t done it, I really encourage you to focus on the exercise questions I suggested for at least one evening with your child to see what you discover.

Stepping back to observe your interaction with your child will give you valuable new awareness and insights about yourself and your child. In my coaching and parenting classes, I frequently suggest parents observe a particular area of their family relationships to see what they discover. They often return with unexpected new insights.

Many parenting techniques rely on fear, rewards, and control to manage a child’s behavior and to get him to listen. Yet these approaches actually limit your child’s capability and full self-expression.

Plus, using bribes and reward dramatically harm your relationship with your child both now and in the long run. In the younger years, these strategies may appear to work and yield the results you want; however, as your child becomes a teenager, these old techniques put huge distances between you and your child.

Teens refuse to be controlled by their parents using these techniques.

Your child of any age wants a mutually honest, loving, trusting relationship with you. Without this kind of relationship with you, their desire and ability to listen diminishes.

A good way to begin to improve how much your child listens to you is with this easy, little-effort exercise. I encourage you to do it tonight!

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Here are the steps of the exercise:

1. Go about your day or evening observing the reality of your child’s desire to listen to you. Ask yourself these questions:

~ How much does my child want to listen to me?

~ What does she do that makes me feel this way?

~ What are the things I do that seem to cause her to pull back and not listen?

~ What are the things I do that seem to invite her to be closer and more connected to me and to want to listen and cooperate more?

2. Have fun observing yourself and your child.

3. Take a few moments and write your answers to the above questions.

4. Last question – What is my most important discovery or insight from observing how much my child wants to listen to me?

5. Share with me and other like-minded parents what you discover.
Share your discoveries and insights below.

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New Teleclass Next Monday! “Why Johnny Doesn’t Listen and What You Can Do About It”

An essential component of Joyous Parenting is having your child listen to you. Trying to raise and live with a child who doesn’t listen is exhausting and stressful. As a parent, you work much harder than you need to.

If you wish getting your child to listen were easier, I’d love to have you join us next Monday for this valuable class filled with practical tools you can use immediately.

If you’re busy next Monday, don’t use that as an excuse not to get this useful information that will make a profound positive difference in how your child listens to you and how much you enjoy one another.

Click here to sign-up and for more info.

Many people believe that parenting is one of the hardest jobs on the planet. It doesn’t have to be. With a few simple tools and insights and your willingness to grow as a person and a parent, parenting can be the truly joyous experience you envisioned when your child was born.

Here’s to making parenting easier and a lot more fun!

To your Joyous Family!
Connie

5 Qualities Your Child Needs to Be Self-Confident

Every parent wants their child to be self-confident, but what does this mean? How can you tell if your child is self-confident? What qualities does he need to have?

It may not be what you think! Academic achievement or social acceptance does not necessarily mean your child is self-confident.

Your child is skilled at learning to be the person she believes you and the other important people in her life want her to be. Then she acts as she believes she ‘should’ rather than the truth of who she is.

Here’s your opportunity to learn those essential qualities your child needs in order to be self-confident. Look below the surface to see what you discover. [Read more…]

3 Important Ways Teaching Manners Can Limit Your Child

I had my 2-year-old granddaughter Madison yesterday morning, and she must have said “Thank you” to me at least 5 times in the short time I had her.

In fact, “Thank you” were some of her very first words, and it always delights me to hear her say it. Especially since no one has ever told her to say this, and I certainly didn’t tell her yesterday.

She thanked me for putting on her socks, for holding her doll for her when she asked me to, for giving her some of the berry shake I made. Ready to have it be this easy with your child?

I share all my secrets in my new video series “How to Foster Heart-Felt Appreciation, Politeness, and Kindness in Your Child,” which is now available for you.

I’m so excited about this convenient, affordable program, not only for the results you can have, but also because the traditional ways of teaching politeness and caring actually limit your child. I tell you all about this in my article below.

Plus, you can have it right now for a one-time only discounted investment. Honestly, you can’t go wrong and it will make such a huge positive difference in your child’s development and in your relationship with your child.

Don’t miss out! Click here to learn all about it.

Happy trails!

To your Joyous Family!
Connie

P.S. A big, warm welcome to all our new readers! I look forward to getting to know you.

P.P.S. Do you know someone who is passionate about being a good parent or who could use a little help to create a more harmonious, fun, and easy relationship with their child? If so, would you please forward this email on to her?

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New Article: 3 Important Ways Teaching Manners Can Limit Your Child

Teaching your child manners and kindness can seem to be pretty straight-forward. Just keep reminding him and telling her, and it will eventually sink it. After all, pretty much everyone you know is doing it this way, so it must be okay.

Not so!

Everyone agrees it is hugely important for children to be self-confident, self-reliant, self-expressive, and to have high self-esteem. In fact, in my recent survey, the most important topic parents want to know about is fostering self-confidence in their child.

You may believe that how you teach self-confidence is unrelated to how you teach politeness and caring to your child. When, in fact, I have found them to be intricately connected.

When you care about your child being self-confident, self-reliant, and having high self-esteem, every interaction matters. The more frequently you repeat a specific way of communicating with your child, the greater the impact and the more powerful a pattern becomes with long term effects.

On the surface, words like “Tell him thank you.” or “Say hello” seem innocent and harmless. Yet when you look at your meta message, the message behind your words, the message contained in your words, your child hears something different.

Your child hears, “I really don’t trust you to know or say the right thing. I have to tell you because if I didn’t, you’re basically incapable of knowing what to say.” Not a very self-confidence inducing message.

Children feel disrespected and treated ‘small’ when we tell them to parrot back what we say. I’ve heard 7 and 8-year-olds tell their parents, “Stop telling me what to say!”

Imagine if your boss or spouse frequently told you what to say. How would that feel to you? Would you like this person very much? Would you even want to be around them? Or would you feel unseen, annoyed, and want them to stop?

This information may come as a surprise to you, and you may not have looked at what you’re doing this way before. I invite you to consider it.

I totally know how much you want to be a good parent to your precious child. You would never intentionally, consciously do something that diminishes your child’s self-reliance and self-expression.

Now the ball is in your court. What can you do differently that encourages your child’s self-expression and self-confidence? What changes are you going to make in how you talk with your child?

These are hugely important questions to ask yourself.

By making your child’s self-confidence, self-expression, and self-reliance some of your highest priorities, you will discover more expansive, effective ways to relate with your child.

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Connie Recommends: “How to Foster Heart-Felt Appreciation, Politeness, and Kindness in your Child”

If you’d like to learn a new, easier approach that actually gets results without all of the reminding and frustration, I invite you get my new video series “How to Foster Heart-Felt Appreciation, Politeness, and Kindness in your Child.”

Every parent wants their child to be on their best behavior during the holidays and year round. This creates a lot of stress for you and your child. That makes this an excellent time of year to support your child to develop and live the art of heart-felt appreciation and kindness.

This information-packed video series teaches you specific steps you can implement immediately and will be invaluable for children of all ages. Plus, you’ll be able to watch the videos anytime, anywhere that is convenient for you, especially during this busy time of year.

You can get my video series for almost 50% off plus a F.EEE bonus by acting today.

Click here to get your program and to learn more..

What is Your Appreciation Quotient?

I spent much of yesterday developing the content for my soon-to-be-released video series “How to Foster Heart-Felt Appreciation, Politeness, and Kindness in Your Child.” I am SO EXCITED to be sharing this information with you! I can hardly contain myself! 🙂

I’ve been wanting to share this easy, effective approach with your for quite a while. I feel so good to be putting it into a format I think you’ll like and that will get you results you want. I’m even including an extra video that is focused specifically on developing heart-felt appreciation in tweens and teens.

Plus I’m including a special one-time bonus for those who take action early. I’ll tell you all about it next week so watch for my email.

Happy trails!

To your Joyous Family!
Connie

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New Video: What is Your Appreciation Quotient?

Heart-felt appreciation is one of the most joyous feelings I know. It is the feeling of being amazingly, delightfully blown away by who someone is or something they do.

Sometimes people call it gratitude. I personally like ‘appreciation.’ This joyous feeling is good for your child and good for you.

In today’s video, I share a story about my experience being appreciative that will inspire you to have more. Plus you’ll see where so many of us fall short of what is possible.

What is your Appreciation Quotient?

What do you most appreciate in your life right now? How does it make you feel? Let me know in Comments below.